Previously we looked at three of The 4 E’s of Controlling Worry Anxiety, Externalize It, Explore It, and Embrace It. In this article we’ll look at the last step, Extinguish It. In this process we give ourselves permission to spend time worrying about something that’s really bothering us. There is a catch here, however! You spend no less than 3 minutes and no more than 15 minutes. The reason is that after 15 minutes your mind will automatically hit the switch over to something else. It’s kind of like when you are trying to complete a puzzle or figure out something technical, it’s best to pause, take a breather, then revisit it. The solution comes to us easier when we do so.
After this I suggest you put it down in writing, perhaps in a worry notebook. I also like the idea of having a “God Box” and writing your worry down on a slip of paper. Then I explain to God that it’s bigger than me and out of my control. I also pray for the gifts of wisdom and discernment for the solution if it’s mine to discover. Once it’s in the notebook or the “God Box” I can always go back and revisit it. Rarely do I find this necessary as I’ve already committed it to His care!
A life coach can lead you through this process and help you to separate the things that aren’t valid concerns, and how to better manage those situations that are. When you move forward, making this a part of your personal growth plan, you are on your way to a more fulfilled, victorious life!
Jan Drury, M.S., C.L.C. jan@lifecoachingpartners.com 251~327~8055
Life Coaching Partners, LLC 